Episode Transcript
Speaker 0 00:00:00 We are Ageri because we create remedies for life made by life. I'm Scarlet Viper, AKA Mrs. Lee and founder of ageri.co your go-to place for Ageri remedies to help you find love, get rich, awaken your intuition and feel free. So now let's open the remedy kit and discover why we're all age it. So what's my remedy for ageism. Well, firstly, what was really interesting for me is that the age discrimination act didn't come into 2004, whereas general discrimination was in 1977. So it wasn't until really later that people began to see the serious effects of when you are discriminated, uh, by your age, especially in the workplace. And what I found amazing too is 63% of Australians have experienced ages and it's the most accepted form of prejudice. So there's actually three different types of age discrimination. And the first one is 18 to 39 from this commission that was done, which is around being, um, people being condescending to you or being ignored.
Speaker 0 00:01:06 Cause we always think it's the other end, but it also happens on the younger side. Uh, 40 to 61 is about finding a job, the right job. And 61 is a general discrimination that we suffer. So it's definitely alive and kicking, you know, ageism. So what is my well, the first one is to acknowledge and to recognize that it exists because it's quite stealth of, uh, begun to realize. And so to see what's happening in the work and the home and to kind of acknowledge it. And the second part is then watching a language around it because we are very much part of it. It's ingrained in us actually. And I'll talk a bit about that later, but the third thing is don't be afraid to speak out because I think if someone is being ageist against someone else to acknowledge that and to stand up for them and also for yourself like to actually, you know, don't lose your voice, continue to engage in network.
Speaker 0 00:02:07 And I think sometimes as we get older, we pull back a bit, we're perhaps more sensitive. Uh, we don't feel we have the energy, which I think is actual crap because I think we do have the energy. And I think to continue putting that effort and energy into engaging and networking is really important. And number five is giving yourself a sense of purpose. So not only for yourself, but if you feel someone has kind of lacking inspirational purpose, help them see the purpose in their life. Cause often it's others that see what your purpose is. So helping others in that front's really important connects with younger people. I think that's really important too, because it actually allows you to feel young because we all feel like I still feel like I'm 21 on the inside. So being around young PIP, you get to see what's happening.
Speaker 0 00:02:56 You get to still be part of innovation, create more good stock shots. But for those who are in the media and do the stock shots, I can't believe how many times did I go in to find some stock shot about, you know, a woman doing something or a man doing something. And they're all so old fashioned it's certainly better than it was five years ago. But please continue to bring that in. I know we're seeing it now in weight where I can now see these beautiful shots of women, of all shapes and sizes being out there. And it's so good. And so I really wanna see that as well in the media and change anti-aging I think there's a lot of language around anti-aging so it's like we don't wanna age, how do we turn back the clock? Can we start changing the conversation around that to aging?
Speaker 0 00:03:43 Well, because with that comes a respect for aging examine your own beliefs. And I think that is so important because a big part of it is we are the most gist of all. We have these beliefs in ourselves that we're getting old, that we're not as valuable. And so please just sit down and do a bit of a stock take on, um, how you feel about aging. I know in fact, when I was starting age rich and I had a real block, I, I can't even explain it. But what happened for me was I realized that I didn't wanna grow old. I had my own resistance to growing old and I was frightened about not being valued or accepted. And I had to go through this whole cathartic kind of realization that, um, I had to find my value and acceptance in getting old and what happened in that place.
Speaker 0 00:04:44 I found this deep richness and love for me. And that's why my spiritual life is so important. So examine your own beliefs because you'll be absolutely shocked at what comes up, um, and reframe your beliefs around your values. And I think that's really important. I talk about this a lot in, um, branding and personal branding is that, you know, your skill sets as we get older, we get more skill sets. As we get older, we have more career paths and it's really healthy. We have more experience and more connections. And so when you bring the combination of all those different aspects together, that creates an entity in itself, which is absolutely unique to you. And what is incredible is that when you have that experience skill sets and career path, um, you know, diversity, you bring an incredible value to an organization and a business to see issues and solutions in a different way.
Speaker 0 00:05:43 So just reframing who you are and what you do, um, can change everything. And finally, uh, I think the most important point and part of the remedy is your family's learning and understanding around aging comes from you. So it's like you teach your children to respect your elders. You know, how do you talk about your mother or your grandmother, or, you know, is there a respect there, is there a value to their life spent or what they're doing? Are you actually adding to the problem by putting your mother down or a parent down someone who's old? Like, are you doing that? And I really ask you to change your language and your point of view around it because one day that's gonna be you as well. And what are your kids gonna do with you? And as a society, we really need to start valuing our elders for many, many reasons.
Speaker 0 00:06:48 And, uh, so there are some key points that I believe will help in stopping ageism. And now we're gonna talk to be beautiful Anne miles. Who's gonna share what she's doing in the world and in the media to help ageism. So without further ado, Anne miles, thank you. Well, I mean, you are a great example of how's so much possibility people don't recognize as we get older and it's kind of embracing the old and I, and the new, it's a kind of an interesting space. I'm really looking forward to seeing what you feel about it all. So if you could just tell me, I mean, you know, what I love about this is I've, I've got to see that to life. We find our own life remedies and that's the beauty about it is we have the answers within us. What is the main life remedy that you see or have learned to?
Speaker 1 00:07:41 I think it's about what we say to ourselves. I, I honestly think there's so many people that they're just on autopilot and stuff comes out of your mouth. That creates seriality. So people like, even in the gym, you know, someone said, oh yeah, when you get older, you get a saggy bum, you know, and I'm like rubbish. You don't, it's not age that makes you have a saggy bum. It's being lazy and sitting on the couch and doing nothing. And you can have that at any age. So I feel catching yourself around the language is like the number one thing. And then that means you can create any reality that you want. So if you go, I can have an amazing body at any age. Uh, then that's the reality that will be there for you.
Speaker 0 00:08:28 I love that. It is. We're just, we have these belief systems that kind of run. I think we've been so impacted by that language around when you get older, you can't do X, Y, and Z, and you there's the whole even retirement thing, which I can't even relate to. And <laugh>, you know, it's like we have to kind of wind down. So I think it's fantastic that you're doing that. And how are you doing it? What are you doing? You are something,
Speaker 1 00:08:53 You know, like one of the points I think that is important is I feel like you have to live true to yourself. And at the end of the day, you don't have to live under anyone. Else's expectations is what that looks like. And I feel like I am doing my best to live, how I want to. And I, and as much as, you know, I might not have some of the things that other people, you know, might measure their life by, Ooh, there's no husband sitting, you know, hanging off my arm or whatever. But at the same time, I feel like I'm more successful and feel more in my honest power now than I've ever been in my whole life and a hundred percent it's around yeah. What I want to do and what really, you know, resonates. So I think that's the number one thing that I'm also doing my own bit to change some of the things out there around the stereotypes.
Speaker 1 00:09:54 Um, so one, my business suits and sneakers is about, um, talent being recognized for the talent without seeing the gender that age, the background first. So the work stands for itself and we can get over some of the bias that's inherent in the marketing and advertising industry. Uh, so that's one, but I'm also really accurate about trying to change government huge and self-regulation systems and really super nerdy stuff like that. And, um, also within sits and sneakers, I share really generously like a lot of content that re educates the industry on, you know, really powerful ways to, um, market segment, without resorting to those old fashioned things like, you know, white female, you know, in a corporate job, you know, this age bracket, like it's actually not that effective. So do my best to reeducate the industry as well. Uh,
Speaker 0 00:10:56 You're amazing. I mean, what, I mean, what is the thing that, you know, how did you get to that place of going, you know, what, I'm enough? Like, what was the remedy for you? What was the learning? I mean, it's your lifetime we're talking about? So it's hard to kinda pin on one thing, but what comes to mind, firstly,
Speaker 1 00:11:14 Would be great to share. I, I think it came firstly from the idea of possibility. So I'm really lucky that I was brought up on a dairy farm and in our world it wasn't gendered. So we just did everything together. Even, you know, kids were doing the jobs with mom and dad together, and there were some things mom and dad split between them for internal jobs and external jobs just for practicality. But they were very clear that, you know, dad was capable of cooking and, you know, doing stuff around the house when it was, you know, needed, but he was better off doing other things. So, but all of the children were expected equally to do things. So we, we had that kind of gender inclusive way of living to begin with. So I'm really grateful for that because when I went out into the commercial, um, world, like I at least had, what the hell, like, why is this all of a sudden a problem?
Speaker 1 00:12:16 Like, why am I all of a sudden, not as important as someone else, even though I might actually have the skills or the talent here. So I was able to challenge it. And unfortunately over the years, I, um, you know, did experience quite a lot of challenge around that topic. And so I would just move on, uh, and I realized how much of a role I was playing in sort of pit putting up with all of that. So I suppose one's the possibility now we're into the next phase, which is about, um, you know, acknowledging what it looked like. And, um, and all the experience came together. And also, uh, I have a transgender child as well. So I learned sort of a whole new world, the world isn't just, you know, binary. Um, and I've been through domestic violence as well, sexual abuse. And <laugh>, I'm saying it like flippantly, but it, you know, it's pretty traumatic stuff. And then there was in the media, there was a article that, um, showed the UK, had a big study that attributed stereotypes in media, marketing and advertising was the cause of domestic violence, bullying and mental health problems. So that's why I went, although been through all of those and I have this unique sort of understanding of the media landscape. I felt like I've been put on this earth to stand up. So then,
Speaker 0 00:13:49 Oh, that's so beautiful. I just got a, a teary when he said that at the end, it was like a, I could feel, you know, I can see everything that you've that's happened in your life has led you to this moment and you can see cuz you've experienced it. So you can say, look, you know, I know what this is. Like, I'm not just talking about it because of whatever reason, isn't that amazing. So, I mean, this leads me to talking about the ages in remedy then. So you are in that space to do that. What would you say to someone who, you know, needs some help around that? What is the remedy that, that someone can
Speaker 1 00:14:24 Do? I think the way that I'm, you know, like you can tell I'm quite activist and I'm, you know, doing stuff every day. I think that number one, when you're an activist, if you too hard, core and negative and even feminism right now is proving to feed, failing, and there's research and data that says that it's not working. So I feel being more inclusive. And also for me, it's about living the example like here I am nearly 60 now I'm 58, uh, this year shortly. And, um, I'm doing my first ever body building competition at the end of the year. <laugh> and I'm like, well, I'm just gonna be a role model for this and challenge myself. And yeah. So I go to the gym six days a week and I feel like that's my little piece here as well.
Speaker 0 00:15:15 So it's really about, so as a remedy, it's just challenging the expectations for yourself really because we, we, I think it is that unconscious bias to go on. I'm too old. I can't do that. Or I can't wear that. I can't do that. Yeah. And what would you say if someone was like, oh, I feel uncomfortable. Or what, what would you say to,
Speaker 1 00:15:36 I do agree that breaking out of the norms can be uncomfortable and you know, that expression, you know, um, of the tribe around you, you can really challenge them. And I definitely have people in my world that go, Ooh, body building's so masculine, you know? And, uh, Ooh, what are you doing that for? You gonna ruin your metabolism. Like people have got everything to pull you down. Um, there are equally amazing people who actually do really support you. And so I've, this is true to me and I feel really empowered on the inside as much as anything by doing this challenge for myself and to set the example. So I feel, yeah, my advice is, you know, you don't have to reject everybody outright, but you can minimize the impact of the negativity and, you know, really just find another little crowd like me and you <laugh> who are really do to, you know, really shake things up and be who we wanna be and do what we wanna do.
Speaker 0 00:16:40 Uh, I love it. And I just, I think, you know, such a great example of how, you know, everything that you've been through and you, you are using that for the best outcome versus I'm a victim to it. And I think, you know, what I've seen so much in the past, I mean, personally is just that, you know, you, you have to really own and take responsibility of where you are today. You know, like you just, there's so much blaming others, blaming schools, blaming the teachers, blaming, blaming the government. And we, we are building a society of, you know, entrepreneurs and come what comes with that is I think the need for people really owning and their power. Cause when you take responsibility, get your power back, you know? So I love that you are doing that. And is, and are you seeing that in the work that you're doing with people? Like, I mean, I'm, cause I wanna talk about age rich and how you know, why we are age rich and are, and just talk a little bit about that. And are you seeing that in the, like in your business?
Speaker 1 00:17:37 Um, I guess it's an ongoing, um, process. So I do feel, you know, people are speaking more about, um, you know, this as an issue. I worked with the bond university on a study a little while back about, uh, you know, ageism in the advertising industry, which is my industry. And the challenge that we have, which I think is, you know, endemic across the wider society as well is we've got good language around gender bias, even racism, but age bias actually is like so invisible. And the challenge is like, even in my gym, someone said to me, um, you know, if you dye your hair, blonde, you'd look so much younger as if, and I just went, wow. I said, you know, that's ages, don't you. And I said, I love my gray hair. I really embrace it. And honestly, if I walk in the street, I get someone every single day telling me they love my hair.
Speaker 1 00:18:37 And so that same person like said something ages like every day for, you know, weeks, it was exhausting. So my challenge is I think people still don't have the language around, you know, what ageism actually is. And I do think the remedy for that though, is to swap out. So if in my gym, uh, and I could list like, you know, 10 things that she said that was like, so incredibly ageist. And even that she thinks, cuz she's coming up towards 50, that she's got a right to be ageist as well. And self deprecating. I'm like, no, you can't say things that are ageist regardless. So the remedy for me is if I was in the gym and she, and someone, or just say a friend of mine is from Africa. Right? And so if someone said, if you took your braids out of your hair and straightened, it you'd look less black. Like how bad is that? Right. People understand that's bad. So, you know, when you hear something you go, is that I just, or what is it if you swap it out to something like that, it's really obvious that
Speaker 0 00:19:49 I love that. That's a great example because it's true. It is you're so right. It's invisible. And I think because of that unconscious bias all the time, we don't even see it. And I mean, hopefully this is what we are doing is just being shining a light. So people start to look at what they're saying. I mean, I had it once cuz you know, when I was working well, you know, I still work in advertising myself with my business. But you know, I went to a function at uh, a big agency and there was about 200 women and some young girl came up to me and said, how's it feel being the oldest woman in the room? Oh goodness. I couldn't believe. And it was so funny because I went, oh really? I looked around thinking, I hadn't even thought about it. Like, you know, I feel as young and as fresh and as innovative as ever. And I think, you know, for me personally, I just can see that as I get older, the skill sets that I build up, the experiences and everything just gives me so much more value. And it's not saying that young people, Aren value, they have another value in a different way. And there's a, you know, for all the different reasons, but you know, really appreciating the value that we bring and that diversity of skill and experience is the future, you know? And that's, you know why we're doing
Speaker 1 00:21:09 What we doing. Thank you so much. And I do totally agree. Like I personally feel absolutely at the top of my game, like I've never been as good at what I do or as, um, capable, experienced, uh, able to problem solve beyond the level that I would've ever been able to before. But I do find myself in meetings sometimes like in events like you are saying, and it's like, people just look through you. Like you just don't even exist. So that's a like yeah, a really super challenging position. And especially for women in their fifties, right now, you not only grew up with gender bias through your career, you are now having ages of with gender bias on top. And unfortunately 50 plus is the fastest growing category of homeless people. So, and I think I, I can almost guarantee that in my industry, if you compare the financial position of a lot of, um, women at this age group, uh, compared to the men at our age group, there's like a huge C you know, huge big gap. So there's potentially some ground will never catch up, but what we can do is make way for the future generations. So that's yeah, my,
Speaker 0 00:22:29 Absolutely. I love it. And you amazing. So what are you doing is perfect. And, and I think it's so true and I like it's, I was just this morning I was going through something and I saw some women who were, you know, overweight and they were showing their skin and looking beautiful. And I felt suddenly I just went, I'm now used to seeing overweight women as models and in there. And I felt I'm so good because what makes that even better? Like that bias of it's better. And I think this is the thing absolute with ageism, which, which we have to do and just to bring it into the conversation and start seeing the normality certainly better now than it was 10 years ago or when I started my six years ago. So I think just, they had to keep going and we need more people like you
Speaker 1 00:23:20 And, you know, hiring, if you need models, like you said, having, you know, diverse, uh, audiences, like if we can help anyone who's even in marketing just to consider putting people of different ages in, and there is an model agency just for gray head, people called the silver Fox.
Speaker 0 00:23:37 I see people who are older in campaigns, which is great. And I just wanna feel it's more than tokenistic. Do you know what I mean? You know, and you can see it's like, it used to be with the whole diversity, but now it's kind of a norm, but I can, it'll be great when it becomes like the norm that becomes be really. Yeah. Yes, exactly. Thank you so much for speaking with today. And how can people find you and work with you and know more about
Speaker 1 00:24:07 You? Um, I really appreciate your time to share this story. So probably, yeah, the company is suits and sneakers.global. Um, but the, my little personal activism is on Instagram and it's live like Ann Miles and a N E M I L E S like kilometers. Um, yeah. So follow me and cheer me on with my body building
Speaker 0 00:24:32 Me will, I'll put all the links below, so everyone's got it as well. Amazing. Well, I so beautiful to talk with you and so grateful for what you're doing in the world. And we'll hopefully talk with you again and see how you're going on your journey.
Speaker 1 00:24:44 Hello. Thanks Ruby.
